Is it wrong that I see fault in myself through others, or that I dont like being smothered. My mind wants to be this guy that has all the girls etc, but my heart wants love and companionship. I am in a divide/ a crossroads of some sorts. Its crazy how you get so much love for everyone other than the person you want the praise from. You hear how you can make a girl so happy but to the person that it matters they dont see it. In my growth i have understand that i make mistakes and have a tad bit of immature and selfish standpoint but dont we all. Why not be selfish with something so sacred as the heart or why not immature when it comes to the powerfulness of love. I know alot of people that read this gonna be like Johnathan why are you opening up on a blog but I am merely letting go of my past on here. Trying to strive to become a better person, it a daily grind but its worth it. Today I saw one of the most liberating things i have seen in a long time. TRUE BLACK LOVE.. and it was beautiful and magical.. it was a blessing for my eyes... coming from a family where love wasnt present and always told to not show any emotion or my cards.. It was good to see a family that made up for all there shortcoming with a smile and love. It warmed my soul and heart to see the perfect picture created from the divine in the form of love..As I pondered I wondered, am i doing everything i can to show the people in my life that i love them and cherish them...I thought to myself would i want the baddest girls in the world or that one girl that i can come home to be secure and understand. As i further thought I started seeing the problem with relationships these days including myself.. I/we or so concerned about looking bad or making a mistake that we lose out on blessing.. No one can stand up on their on 2 in this crazy world but if two people lean on each other they can support each other and make it... I just want that love I saw today....cause with that i saw hope..I saw hope for me at least.In closing I think I am at the point now where I can be the man that GOD has destined for me...not saying I am not gonnna make mistakes but my heart is in the right place i think now. I just want that blessing and my bestfriend...wether or not I have found it..I will make sure it comes to past...If you a scared to fail you will never pass... and i need to remember that... I let twitter and Facebook dictate my thoughts and opinions instead of my heart and my mind. So easy I get caught up seeing someone type someone and instead of asking I just retaliate and I need to work on that.. Life is process just
make sure the way you are going is progress. and ima get better everyday.. See the potential in me and we cant fail.. cause I am a work in Progess
Every Peak will have two valleys,hopeful eyes in the comfort of true protection. And admiration of the heart of a child, that forever, Forever is to strive the peace of endearment.Forever is what I want with you..I am sometimes confused but I need the solution. to our solution. I just want to place my one grain a spirtual sand in your hand hope you put it in your heart. Getting into my 20's just trying to survive in this world, you start gaining age and experience and seeing for what all this is that we call our world. I not gonna question GOD blessings an old man told me Curiostiy killed the Catechism. In the end I know I want master this like tiger.. so its all about my drive to make this work.
've lived and I've learned
I have taken and I've earned
I have laughed, I've cried
I have failed and I have tried
Sunshine, pouring rain
found joy through all my pain
I just wanna be happy with being me and being with you
No comments:
Post a Comment